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Academy Awards Replaces “Controversial” Whoopi Goldberg with Keanu Reeves as MC

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The 109th Annual Academy Awards announced a major shift in its hosting lineup. Whoopi Goldberg, who was told last March that she was chosen to head the show in 2023, was snubbed by the ceremony committee.

“Ms. Goldberg has become too toxic and controversial,” said Committee Chairman Joe Barron, “I’d say it was a difficult decision but it really wasn’t. She more or less did this to herself.”

The problem, according to Whoopi’s social media expert Skip Tetheludah, is that she couldn’t keep both her own fanbase and a politically opposite cult-like “group of potatoes” happy at the same time. ‘It’s easier to just keep them entertained with nonsense. So we don’t really question it.”

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