ALLOD Journalisticator Tara Newhole was unable to find independent corroboration of the rumor, which means what we have here, patriots…is an exclusive.
That’s right, my fellow Americans. You heard it first here at The Dunning-Kruger Times, where every store will either reward the people you admire or punish those you don’t. Fortunately, without the need for all of that “research” when we quote a source, we can bring you the truth in ways other publications only dream of.
Neither Jordan nor James was available for comment, but their spokesman, Joe Barron, who somehow works for both of them, said we should stop calling there before they file harassment charges.
The truth shall set you free, patriots. God Bless America.